In English my name means hope. In Spanish it means too many letters. It means sadness, it means waiting. It is like the number nine. A muddy color. It is the Mexican records my father plays on Sunday mornings when he is shaving, songs like sobbing.
            
                
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            It was my great-grandmother's name and now it is mine. She was a horse woman too, born like me in the Chinese year of the horse -- which is supposed to be bad luck if you're born female -- but I think this is a Chinese lie because the Chinese, like the Mexicans, don't like their women strong.
            
                
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                    第四章: 我的名字 My Name
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